I yearned to be a mother. Why did I feel nothing when my daughter was finally born?
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I had presumed I would love her instantly – but a traumatic birth led to devastating numbnessIt wasn’t supposed to be like this. I was waiting for an overwhelming rush of love, but when I looked at my newborn baby what I felt was utter despair. No matter how much I smiled at her, crooned at her, fed, patted, caressed and changed her, I was absolutely numb.I had yearned for her. Growing up in Italy, I was surrounded by images of perfect motherhood. Every rural crossroad has its tiny shrine to the
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